Lofty Expectations from Imperfect People

missed-mark

Lofty expectations from imperfect people are a recipe for disappointment and unforgiveness. As children we see our parents, grandparents, family members, and teachers as perfect specimens of human virtue. As we grow and mature, we begin to see their faults, mistakes and other shortcomings. And while the world you grew up in may have been filled with imperfect people (some more imperfect than others), you must learn to forgive and move on. More than likely, the people around you were operating out of their past experiences and not in ways to harm you or your self esteem. There comes a point in your life when you realize your parents aren't perfect - Mia Wasikowska As the prolific poet and writer, Dr. Maya Angelou says, … [Read more...]

Stop to Smell the Roses While In Pursuit of Happiness

Are you waiting for your situation to change so you can be happy? Many people are waiting for that illusive dream to manifest, the great idea to be implemented, the new house, car or some other tangible evidence that says they are Happy. Stop to smell the roses while in pursuit of happiness! Happiness is a state of mind based on how worthy you feel, how deserving you think you are of good things coming your way. Your internal critic (the negative messages received and embedded in your subconscious) may attempt to sabotage your happiness quotient which will in turn affect your level of self-confidence and self-esteem. Self-confidence is the realistic and positive expectations you have for yourself, your abilities and others. … [Read more...]

In Pursuit of Happiness

Happy people

  Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony - Gandhi Most people expend a great amount of time looking for happiness in all the wrong places . They chase dreams rather than live dreams. Their lives are stimulated only by addictions, religions, and even other people in a futile attempt to fill the void with purpose and meaning. The irony is the only place they ever needed to search was within. Happiness is a state of mind based on how worthy you feel. How you feel about yourself is a direct result of the accumulated experiences you have had, particular growing up.  For instance, if you grew up being made to feel worthy, valued, loved, protected and respected, most likely you feel … [Read more...]

Stop the People-Pleasing Syndrome Dead in its Tracks

Pleasing others is not necessarily a bad thing. Considering the needs of others, graciousness and the willingness to help others are admirable traits. For many people, the desire to please becomes a reliance on others for approval and acceptance, even when it restricts their own happiness and health. Constantly trying to gain acceptance, validation and approval is a detriment to relations, health and sabotages boundary making. "As a people-pleaser, you feel controlled by your need to please others and addicted to their approval. At the same time, you feel out of control over the pressures and demands on your life that these needs have created” writes Harriet B. Braiker, Ph.D., in The Disease to Please. Consider the following … [Read more...]