Are you feeling like you are scrambling around lost in a dark tunnel without a flashlight to guide you? Fear can make you feel that way.
Don’t beat yourself up. There are a lot of women who experience that same feeling while doing and giving even more to our families, careers, and community responsibilities that we often feel overwhelmed by the sheer volume of things we have on our plates.
I’ve felt that way myself from time to time while I was trying to juggle a gazillion hats, taking care of everybody but me and living a life of overwhelm, confusion and anxiety.
The same kind of fear you feel when you find yourself in an unfamiliar dark place with no way to see your way out is the kind of fear that a lot of women experience every day. It’s the kind of fear that puts limits how you live your life, keeps you stuck in roles you didn’t create and hinders you from living a life of freedom and joy.
We all have moments of fear but when it immobilizes you and keeps you from living your best life, that’s when it’s time to shed some light on fear and expose it for what it really is.
So how do you do that?
- First, you must understand the difference between healthy fear that keeps you safe and unhealthful fear that keeps mired in overwhelm, worry and uncertainty. Fear is a False Expectation Appearing Real [without any proof]. Take a close look at the belief you hold that is powering the fear. For example, if your comfort zone doesn’t allow you to risk taking on a new challenge or pursuing an opportunity that you know you want, maybe you’ve received a negative message early in your life that you’ve translated into a strong negative belief about yourself and/or your abilities
- Secondly, know without a doubt that fear has no power except that which you give it. Look fear straight in the eye and say, “you can no longer control me and keep me hostage”. Take back your power with a vengeance.
- And, last, but not least, be able to recognize when unhealthful fear appears in your life. Consider the times when you didn’t speak up just so you would avoid conflict. Question your real motivation for not taking a desired action. Are you operating out of guilt, frustration or because of perceived expectations?
Once you are clear about what fears keep you stuck in intolerable situations and overwhelm, you’re in a position to write a new script for your life where you become the sole author, editor and producer of your new destiny.
Doesn’t that sound yummy…
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Until Next time…
Gladys Anderson, founder of Coach for YOUR Dreams, is a certified life coach, licensed marriage and family therapist, writer and speaker. Gladys combines years of experience, training and a genuine commitment to helping nurses, teachers, therapists and other care giving women to set limits so they have more time, and energy to devote to self-care.