7 Stress Busting Tips for the Holidays

Holidays are filled with joyous times spend with family and loved ones but can often be stressful as well. Some studies indicate that stress, depression and suicide are highest during the holiday season.  To reduce stress, overwhelm and possible depression, consider some of these stress busting tips for the holidays, practice some good self care and enjoy! Start your list early.  Even if you change your mind, you have a guideline in place for gift giving and shopping.  I usually start my list early in the year as I listen to what my family and friends say are on their wish list.  Of course, the list might change by December but I've already gotten a head start and can avoid the last minute buying frenzy. Budget wisely.  Assign a … [Read more...]

Put Multitasking on Hold

Lately, I've been thinking a lot about how I can put multitasking on hold mostly when I'm on a call and another is waiting or I glance at my computer screen and see I am working in several windows simultaneously. Multitasking can easily become a big part of our lives especially now with the busy holiday season fast approaching.  And, all of this multitasking starts to make me feel like I'm on an out of control roller coaster wishing someone would put on the brakes.  Like most women, I find myself occasionally deep in the throes of multitasking and busyness. But, when I can slow down long enough to allow myself some breathing space, I realize that in addition to all the appointments, household chores, social commitments, and other demands … [Read more...]

Do You Make These Deadly Mistakes When Carving Out Time for Self-Care?

I know how difficult it is to carve out space for self-care when you are inundated with the ironing, cooking, cleaning and trying to balance your personal and professional life. It  may seem like all the demands made on you are draining you of precious energy and you're so tired you could sleep for a week,  yet you might not sleep well even if you have time. It's hard to believe,  but we are just a few weeks away from the busy holiday season. The struggle for self-care will be even more evident when we take on the added stress of shopping for gifts, entertaining and trying to fit self-care into our busy schedules. Do you make these deadly mistakes when carving out time for self care? Saying "yes" when you really want to say … [Read more...]

You Are Meant to Illuminate the World with Your Light!

"Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us”, as Marianne Williamson’s writes in her famous book,  A Return to Love: Reflections on the Principles of “A Course in Miracles. Her words continue to inspire and remind me to let my light shine. We all have our own special light to shine into the world. But so often our aspirations get buried under a bushel of doubt, insecurity and fear. You are meant to illuminate the world with your light! It may be that you want to return to school to learn a new skill, change the way you react and respond to the people in your life, or it may be that you want more time and energy for self care.  Whatever vision you have for your … [Read more...]

Bad News is a Bummer

Bad news is a bummer. It matters little if the news is life changing or a disappointing outcome; it can easily be a shock or a setback. Last week, my day started out as usual until I got a phone call from a relative with some pretty disturbing news that changed my whole outlook. When things like that happen, do you resort to hand wringing, crying, questioning "why", what if", and "if only”? I must admit, for a short while I was stuck in worry mode. After taking some really deep breaths to get centered, I focused on what I could realistically do about the situation. This is what I came up with to bounce back from worry: Be Realistic - Is there anything you can do to realistically change the situation? If you can change the … [Read more...]

When Good Enough is Enough

The concept of good enough comes from the psychiatrist and psychoanalyst, John Bowlby's theory about "good enough parenting".  The premise is that children can and do thrive with parental substitutes (relatives, adoptive parents, etc) and that this mothering is good enough even when the child was deprived of a connection with his birth mother. As I thought about this theory, I couldn't help but wonder how we strive for perfection and don't accept when good enough is enough. Most of us have been programmed for perfection. We are taught early to avoid what is considered failure at all cost. In our schools, we learn a to strive for an 'A" or a perfect score and anything less is considered a failure. What about those students who get a … [Read more...]

Can Money Buy Happiness?

I once had a cute little refrigerator magnet that said, “money can’t buy happiness but it can buy a week in the Bahamas”. Your level of happiness is never determined by your purchasing power.  Of course, having access to enough money to be comfortable is preferable to living in poverty but it does not insure your happiness. The Boston Globe ran an interesting article some time ago drawing from research into that time worn question: Can money buy happiness?  The study found that "there's a certain point beyond  which people have enough to comfortably feed, clothe, and house themselves, having more money - even a lot more money - makes them only a little bit happier". These days money is a hot topic  – how much you have, will you … [Read more...]

Choose Your Words Carefully – Use Empowering Words

Choose your words carefully and make your wishes known by using empowering words such as I choose to/not to or I will/won't.  Disempowering words like "I/you can't, "I/you have to", and "I/you should", send the message that you easily give away your power or you’re attempting to disempower someone else with misguided expectations. For example, every time I find myself saying  “I should”, I ask myself am I responding to my wishes or someone else's.  This is the formula I use: Is it good for me? Is it good for them? Do I want to do it If it's not something you really want to do or you're considering doing it because you want to please or you're looking to get validation or acceptance, then you are responding to an unspoken … [Read more...]

Self-Care Can Sneak Its Way Into Your Daily Routine

 Self-care can sneak its way into your daily routine even when you’re so exhausted you hardly have enough energy to crawl out of bed. But, if you don’t make space daily for self-care you end up often feeling irritable, anxious, depressed or bored.  And all of that negative energy further depletes you and pushes self-care even farther into the background. According to Dr. Christiane Northrup, a women’s health expert, the key to self-care is knowing in your heart that the best way you can care for others is by caring for yourself.  It’s not selfish or to take care of yourself first.  By doing so, you are assured that you have enough energy to take care of the other people in your life. Here are some easy ways you can let self care … [Read more...]

Who Else Wants to End 2010 With a Bang?

Summer has hardly settled into Autumn and already  I’m starting to see Holiday advertisements long before I’m ready to even think about shopping, cooking, entertaining and decorating.  Maybe it’s just me, but everything seems rushed and the weeks just seem to fly by. I still have a lot to accomplish before year end and maybe you do too.  And no matter how much  you plan and organize, you are still adding to your to-do-list. I don’t know about you but with a little over than 3 months left in 2010, I have many miles to go before I sleep! So, who else wants to end 2010 with a bang? I sure do. And, here are some tips to give you a head start to end 2010 with a bang: Review your goals - Review the things you want to … [Read more...]