No More Excuses – Turn Limiting Beliefs into Empowering Thoughts

Do you hold self limiting beliefs about yourself and what you can do, be or have? A limiting belief is a deep seated thought formed by family, culture, society or group.  It's a belief that guides how you live your life, either consciously or subconsciously.  Often, these beliefs  place restrictions on who you can become and what you can achieve. Limiting beliefs can easily morph into a litany of excuses for not moving forward in your life. We all make excuses at some time in our lives…but the reality is whether or not you allow limiting beliefs to transform your life or maintain the status quo. Your  excuse may be that you're waiting for the right time, the right place, right circumstances and your statements are peppered with "I … [Read more...]

3 Tips to Set Strong Boundaries

  Your boundary is the invisible shield you put up to protect the many demands placed on your time, energy, and resources. Visualize your boundary as a shield that protects you from energy drainers, time takers and resource stealers. Protect your boundaries by learning to say NO. Begin setting strong boundaries by using these 3 tips: Practice – Practice saying NO.  You always have the power to say NO to any request just as others have the power to say NO to your requests. When you say NO to a request for money, time, gifts or commitments, you are in essence asserting your power and authenticity.  You get to set your own boundaries. You take charge of your time, energy and resources. If you are in the habit of saying YES … [Read more...]

How To Throw Light On Fears That Keep You In The Dark

Are you feeling like you are scrambling around lost in a dark tunnel without a flashlight to guide you?  Fear can make you feel that way. Don’t beat yourself up. There are a lot of women who experience that same feeling while doing and giving even more to our families, careers, and community responsibilities that we often feel overwhelmed by the sheer volume of things we have on our plates. I’ve felt that way myself from time to time while I was trying to juggle a gazillion hats, taking care of everybody but me and living a life of overwhelm, confusion and anxiety. The same kind of fear you feel when you find yourself in an unfamiliar dark place with no way to see your way out is the kind of fear that a lot of women experience … [Read more...]

Top 3 Things You Can Do To Set Boundaries That Give You Control of Your Life

There is so much in life we have little or no control over. You can't control the weather or the sun rising or setting but the good news is there are many other things that you absolutely CAN control. Here are some of them: 1) Let Go of Expectations Let go of the notion that you can change another person, their actions or non-actions. Your moral compass may not be the same as someone else's. When you let go of the expectations you have of others, you can have more control of your own life. It opens up your mind to focus on your own life and more time to focus on what truly matters to YOU. When you let go of the expectations you have of others, you will no longer allow anyone to yank your chain causing knee-jerk reaction fraught with … [Read more...]

Enjoy the Rewards Along the Journey

I don’t buy lottery tickets but if I did, I would be among the many who invest in the fallacy that they will become the next multi-millionaire. A lot of us are living our lives waiting to hit the illusive jackpot. And for some of us, the jackpot is usually – when I get settled” (whatever that means), “after I pay off some debt”, “as soon as I can find time”, “when the last child is off to college” and other far-off reward thinking. Why not enjoy as much of the journey as possible now and not put off joy today for that magical reward when you arrive at some illusive destination? What have you missed spending a big portion of your life waiting…and missing out on some delicious opportunities to savor the moment? As a young girl, I can … [Read more...]

How to Attract More Abundance – Show Gratitude for What You Already Have

We spend so much time focusing on all the things that go wrong in our world that we give often overlook the abundance already in our lives and the things that are going well for us. It's common knowledge that we should be grateful but we don't always take the time to stop and take stock of just how much abundance we already have in our lives. Here are some things to be grateful for that you can easily overlook: The gift of time No matter how "busy" you say you are, you still find time to use in non-productive, time killer activities. Time is still your most precious gift.  Think about how often you waste this special gift. Are you spending countless hours indulging in mindless TV watching, browsing the Internet, chatting on the … [Read more...]

How You Lose Sleep with Daylight Savings Time

Every year in this part of the country, we get to change our internal and physical clocks ahead one hour so we get more daylight hours and less darkness. Here in the Northeast where it can start getting dark around 4 pm in the winter, more daylight can be a good thing. Yet some states--Arizona and Hawaii--do not observe DST.  Neither do the U.S. territories American Samoa, Puerto Rico and the U.S. Virgin Island. Changing our internal clocks can lead to even more sleep deprivation and in some cases, physical ailments. The experts say we should get 8 hours of sleep a night.  Yet, a poll of 1000 people done by the National Sleep Foundation discovered that 58% of us rarely get a good nights sleep. And most of us get less than six hours of … [Read more...]

How My Palm Pilot Turned into a Problem Child

When you come in contact with people who disregard your boundaries, it’s like inviting unwelcome guests into your home so they can ignore you, disrespect you and leave a trail of negativity behind. For years I used a Palm pda system to keep track of my calendar and contact lists and a cell phone for making and receiving calls.  I often wonder how any of us ever manage our lives without a pda or smartphone. I loved my baby Palm and, like most babies, my palm grew up. She turned into a problem child. Her behavior became erratic.  She was uncooperative, stuck and downright difficult.  She no longer respected my time as being important and refused to take responsibility for her inaction. She no longer listened to me. She didn’t take my … [Read more...]

Pretty is as Pretty Does

I often use to hear my grandmother say, “pretty is as pretty does”  whenever someone complimented one of her grandchildren on their looks. It was one of those sayings that I heard often, but never really giving much thought to what it meant until recently. Recently, as I waited in a line [practicing patience], I overheard a well dressed, attractive young woman say to someone in a rather nasty tone, “what the *%&*^ are you looking at?”  And, immediately I was transported back to my childhood hearing my grandmother’s voice, "pretty is as pretty does". No matter how well dressed, articulate or well connected you are if you are not pretty on the inside, you present your ugly side to the world – just like the woman I overheard … [Read more...]

The Secret to Making Changes in Your Life

Bill O'Hanlon, a well-known family therapist, says in his book, "Do One Thing Different" to focus on the solution rather than the problem. I couldn't agree more.  When all of your attention is given to the problem at hand, you end up with very little energy to apply to a solution. Long before I read The Secret,  I learned from Bill O'Hanlon that changing my thoughts and what I  paid attention to is a way for me to bring about a desired change. In my practice, I come across people everyday who say they want change but are unwilling to challenge faulty beliefs about themselves, the situation or do something different. It's much more helpful to look at the things that are going well and exceptions rather than dwelling on the … [Read more...]