Have you ever watched a self-confident woman enter a room? Did you notice the purposeful walk, the smile that says “I’m here in all my glory” without seeming cocky or boastful? Did you also notice how she seemed to look into the eyes of everyone she passes with a genuine greeting and smile? Did you pay attention to how she seemed to focus intently on the person she was talking to?
Have you ever witnessed someone like that woman and wondered “how does she come across so confident”? “What’s her secret”?
Confident people make mistakes – they admit to it; they know who they are – warts and all. When an end result is uncertain, confident people will say, “I’ll try” because they know they will likely succeed and if they don’t, they feel they will succeed another time. People who lack self confidence believe they will fail before even trying. Those who are overconfident believe it is their right to succeed without having to work for it.
You can choose to act as though you have confidence even if you don’t feel confident at the moment. Watch people you think have confidence and emulate them. The external images are the same for a truly confident person and one who is posing as confident. In other words, fake it until you make it…
The more you practice being confident, the more others will perceive you as confident and the more you will believe you are confident. The confidence you were pretending to have becomes more authentic and leads to more confidence.
You can start today to display more self-confidence in your life. Here are five tips to boost your confidence immediately.
1. Walk Tall: You can tell how a person feels about herself by the way she walks. Is it sluggish, weary, uneasy? Or is it full of life and resolute? People with confidence walk quickly. They have places to go, people to see, and important work to do. Even if you aren’t in a hurry, you can increase your self confidence by putting some pep in your step. Walking 25% faster will make to you look and feel more important.
2. Stand up Straight: Likewise, the way a person carries herself also tells a story. People with slumped shoulders and ill at ease actions usually are lacking self-confidence. They don’t think of themselves as significant and lack passion about what they are doing. Practice good posture and you will automatically feel more confident. Stand up straight, keep your head up, and make eye contact. You will make a positive impression on others and immediately feel more alert and powerful.
3. Be Grateful: Devote some time each day to list everything you have to be grateful for. Recall your past successes, unique skills, loving relationships, and positive momentum. You’ll be amazed how much you have going for you and motivated to take that next step towards success. When you focus too much on what you don’t have, the mind creates reasons why you can’t have it. This leads you to dwell on your weaknesses. The best way to avoid this is consciously focusing on gratitude.
4. Express Yourself: By making an effort to speak up at least once in every group discussion, you will become a better public speaker, and more secure in you own thoughts and ideas.
5. Take a Front Seat: In any assembly, group, or classroom, most people tend to avoid sitting at the front of the room. The back of the room is preferable because they are fearful that they will be noticed or called upon. This reflects a lack of self-confidence. Making the decision to sit in the front row confronts this irrational fear head on and at the same time, builds self confidence.
Remember, Rome wasn’t built in a day. Practice building self confidence and if you falter, get right back up and try again! I promise you it will get easier.
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